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Awkward & Awesome Thursday!

March 3, 2011

By:

Erin Schrader

Awkward

1. My boss’s cubicle looks a little a lot like this:
As any smart lady knows, that glass can easily be used as a mirror. So that’s what I used it for…while he was sitting there. Oops. I failed to realize that anything I do, he can see. And he saw.
Thankfully I was only to adjusting my scarf when he noticed. 
Note to self: Next time bra comes unclasped, walk to the bathroom to fix that mishap; don’t rely on boss’s cubicle.
2. Having my dad call me by his dog’s name. This happens repeatedly people. “Hey Ellie-get me some ice cream.” Come again? Apparently I am easily mistaken for a curly, smelly, mut. Cool dad.  Speaking of mistaking dogs with people…
3. Shawn managed to yell a friend’s name from high school (instead of our dog, Maggie) while she was being a nuisance this past week. We were in bed almost asleep and all of a sudden I hear “_______ (I will save them the embarrassment of knowing they were mistaken for a dog) stop!” It was probably one of the funnier things that happened in our bed this week, but awkward none the less.  
4. Middle Schoolers. The way they look, their humor, the things they say, and their hormones. Saying this age is awkward is an understatement. If you are a middle schooler reading this, I am not talking about YOU. Clearly you are cool, it is all the other ones I am talking about 🙂
    
5. Brad & Ashley’s date on the Bachelor this past Monday. Yikes. Between the blank stares, comments about the netting surrounding the bed, and long moments of silence, I was reminded how thankful I am that I don’t have to experience these awkward moments in the dating world.
6. Tailgating Following your neighbor a little too close while still in the neighborhood. I realized I was doing so after noticing the death glares I was getting in the rear view mirror. No Christmas cookies for me this year apparently, woopsie. Worse yet? Getting pulled over AND receiving a ticket by a policeman…while in my neighborhood. Since when is that legal? Not only am I the hated tailgater now, I’m the criminal in the hood. At least I’ve made a name for myself.
7. Another bathroom experience. I can’t escape them these days. This week I was standing in line at a public restroom and the girl in the stall shouts to her friend “Uuuugggh, I don’t feel good. My stomach is killlllling me.” Note to self: Do not step foot in that stall, you do not want to witness the side effects of her stomach issues.
8. The tongue scraper that was on the outside of my toothbrush package that I bought this week. Really? Thanks but I think I’ll pass on scraping my tongue against something that thousands of other Meijer shoppers might’ve decided to rub their tongues on. At least entice me with a delicious flavor or something..Silly marketing people.
         
Awesome
  1. When my husband decides to have a freak out moment mid-sleep. Like the time he suddenly sat up in bed, hands in claw position, yelling “ROOOAAAAARRR”. He was chasing a bear, pretty sure he had to win. After the initial wetting of the pants on my end, it was pretty flippin hysterical. And now I can finally rest my head at night knowing we are well versed in fighting off any bears that may wander in our home. Phew.
  2. Tickle sessions. Underneath all of the hate screams and tears, I really do love them. Or attacking on other people. I secretly planned a tickle session on my niece last week, she had no idea it was coming. Apparently I’m a master at outsmarting 11 month olds.
  3. Walking downtown on my lunch (except when you forget to wear socks and it is only 32 degrees outside, frozen toes is not a good condition to have). Back to the whole walking thing-now that hubby & I carpool to work, I can do this. Carpool you ask? Yup, it saves money according to my man. And saving money means I have one happy husband. Little does he know, I walk downtown to spend mucho more money than I would’ve spent in gas for the day. Guess he knows now. Uh oh.
  4. Coming home to the dishes being unloaded from the dishwasher. This transforms me in to the happiest woman in the planet and even causes tears to formulate in my eyes. Not kidding. I am a weeping willow sometimes. But a happy weeping willow so it’s all good.
5. Eating Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups out of a baby chicks belly.
You heard me.
Nothing beats an already digested treat. Try it.
You won’t be disappointed.

                                     

6. I mentioned the eyebrow raise in this post. Well, the eyebrow raise has escalated into a booty smack lately. I think this is his way of hinting that I need to get that tush of mine in shape. Jokes on him. If that is his way of hinting, you best believe I am not going to do a thing to make it stop. Baby got back?
Soon.
7. My momma and her brand spankin new antique business. I would call her a Rockstar but I just remembered Charlie Sheen used that term to describe himself in some of his interviews this week. So momma, you are a superstar. So proud of you =) If anybody in the area needs some new old stuff, check her out at Old Creamery Antiques.
 

8. My $20 credit card bill this month. Whoa. I don’t think I’ve seen a number that low in years. Remember that love confession I made to my Luxe card here? One day later I got a letter in the mail stating my Luxe status had been dropped. Apparently they don’t see the awesomeness in $20 credit card bills like I do. Haters.

9. Terms such as Sweet Sassy Molassy, Old Man Sam, and Scrum-diddly-umptios. Expect to see these in regular occurance on here.
10. Last but not least, YOU. Yup, I am talking about you.
Don’t act surprised 🙂
Happy Thursday!
 Hope you enjoyed the nice mix of black and brown coloring that my blog decided to use this morning.
She is a little bit indecisive apparently. Please forgive her.

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