The Day That I Discovered I Am No Longer Cool

Have you ever had one of those moments as you are sitting on the couch in your fleece robe (read: not that sexy silk stuff), staring down at your ginormous Croc slippers, sipping on bottled water, and realized "oh my gosh - it's St. Patricks Day and I haven't even had a green beer yet!" 

Well, I did. Tonight. 

But that's not the lowest point of the story. I didn't have a green beer today because I spent my dinner eating at the McDonald's PlayPlace. And not that there is anything wrong with the McDonald's PlayPlace, unless of course you have a strong dislike for the smell of feet and poop of children under the age of 7, but it's not exactly where I would have envisioned myself celebrating one of the greatest holidays. You know those "where do you see yourself in 5 years?" questions -- apparently you are supposed to actually have a plan for that because if not, well you end up like me. 

As my mind was swimming in all of this "I am so old, I have lost all coolness, blah blah blah" misery I thought to myself "self -- certainly you weren't doing many better things on this day over the past several years!" so in effort to make myself feel a little bit better, I took to my photo archive. 

Unfortunately, this is what I found when looking back at the past 5 St Patty's Day festivities. 

Throwing parties. Throwing down on the dance floor. Drinking green beer like a real person in their 20's. I had it all. 

And now? Bottled water, fleece robes, and McDonald's it is. 

Young children of the world, live it up. You will never be as awesome as you are right now. Believe me on this one. 

ps. In my "desperate to still be cool" defense, today was my niece's third birthday hence the McDonald's dinner and lack of alcohol. Not that there is any good excuse for my behavior, but at least she's cute so that somewhat makes up for it. Happy 3rd birthday my lucky little charm. May you always be confident enough to shove cookie monsters down your throat with pride. 



  1. I can honestly say I've never had green beer, but I don't really like beer, so does green make all the difference?
    I like to enjoy Irish food, but last night, it was all about HyVee Chinese, and watching old movies with my dad (not even old Irish movies, like "The Quiet Man" starring Maureen O'Hara and John Wayne). I doubt I've ever been "cool." ;-)

  2. YES! Last night we attempted to get green beer... then decided we're too old to wait 30 min for a table and didn't want to stand at the crowded bar... SO we hit the Italian restaurant across the street. I'm so not cool anymore! lol

    ...and Happy Birthday to your niece! xo

  3. Ha! This is so spot on! I feel the same way. When I feel a young 20 something is judging me, I just remind myself that some day they will too get old:)

  4. I love this post! We don't have any kids running around our house yet, but totally know the feeling! We did not partake in green beer or go to an Irish pub last night either. I personally can't handle getting up the next morning after long nights like I used to!! Oh to get older ;-)


    La Joie de Vivre

  5. Your niece is totally your mini-me! Except for the cupcake face. At least from what you're telling us. :)

  6. ohhhh how the mighty have fallen ;)
    BUT actually the robe and the McDonald's sound pretty rad to me - much less effort than the other option!

  7. lol HILARIOUS! And can I ever sadly relate


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