2.18.2013

Who Do I Write For?

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I am holding onto every hope that I have that this post makes an ounce of sense. 
I woke up feeling like a train ran me over, then proceeded to go to an all day training event that involved games, suckers, and more suckers. The suckers were the fun part. After that I went out for cocktails with friends because that's just what one does these days when they already feel like trash, and then from there I drove an hour in the rain getting my inspiration on from Mumford and Sons. Gosh I love those boys. 
Needless to say it's 8:00 pm going on midnight (or so it feels). My head is somewhere up there in outer space and my bones are begging me to take a bath. Oh, and my voice? It's deeper than (insert a name of a guy you know with a really deep voice) and even my husband has asked me to stop talking. I think he feels weird when his wife sounds like a husband. Fortunately this has confirmed the fact that he likes his woman to be a woman. Not that I thought that he was into men. Never mind. I told you this post wouldn't make sense. 
Back to what I was saying. In the midst of my holy moment with the rain, the dark, my steering wheel, and Mumford, I got to thinking. Thinking about this whole blogging thing. It's really all my mind defaults to these days..well other than what food I should eat next. If you blog, do you ever just stop and ask yourself 
"What am I doing this for?!" "Who am I writing for!?" If you haven't, I encourage you do. It's a heck of a lot of time to spend on something to not ever ask yourself for what purpose you are doing it. 
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Here's my thing though. I don't think I write for you. I don't know if that is bad or good. Now that I mention it, I don't think there is a right or wrong to this whole thing. I just don't think at the end of the day it's something I do for other's input. If I've learned anything in my short 26 years of life, it's that if your purpose is to please others, you will be disappointed. Humans let us down. People say mean things. Sometimes people don't always comment as much as we think they should. We will think we are funnier than others will. Our sarcasm will offend. Our jokes will be too childish. Our outfits will be ugly. We will not please everybody. And I think that's how it's supposed to be. If I am pleasing everybody, I am probably not being true to myself. And while I enjoy positive feedback, it's not worth being somebody I am not. With that being said though, do I have a desire to have other's reading what I publish? Yes. But for my benefit? Not necessarily. At the end of the day, when I hit publish, I am hitting publish for me. Publish to me means dedication. Persistence. Hard work. Therapy. Memories for another day in time. It's a documented journey of this adventure I am on. This blog is my place I come to on a daily basis. It's a part of me. The majority of the time when I write, I don't think about the fact that there will be somebody on the other end reading. Whether this is good or bad, again..I don't know. It's just how it is. 
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I am really hoping this doesn't come across as ungrateful because while I say these things, I have an abundance of gratitude to my readers. Connecting with you all has blown my mother freaking mind. 
You make showing up to this space more fun. But if you don't some days? It's okay. It's okay because I have one more post under my belt that has given me thirty minutes to myself to "just be". 
You've allowed me to sit and write, laugh, think, and Lord willing..grow as a person. You've helped me prove to myself that hey--even when I am tired and really just want to go to sleep, I have it in me to put something out there to be read in a year or two. So thank you. For showing up, for not showing up, for just being. I like you for that. 
So who do you write for? 
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Today's featured sponsor is two girls that I am absolutely smitten by..Louisa and Camilla from Best Of Two Sisters
Have you ever seen two sisters that are so stinkin' adorable and have that much fun together? So as you know, I prefer to do the write-up about those I am sharing. But what happens when their words are better than mine? Why, I use theirs of course. Here's what these two ladies had to say about themselves. 
"Despite five and a half years age difference we are the best of friends, polar opposites, yet exactly the same, at times each others worst nightmare, but always each others biggest fan club. Our blog - filled with creative photography and words on modern international family life. You like us? We like you too. We´re very uncomplicated like that. Feel free to join the conversation, we don´t bite. Just sometimes shout (and then mostly at our children. HA)."
I mean how do you NOT want to get to know them? These two (and all their littles) have my heart. 
Go say hello and stay awhile. Their space is beautiful. Their pictures are beautiful. Their hearts are beautiful. 
Can you tell I am a fan yet? 
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46 comments:

  1. I think it has to be for you...I know I write for myself, because if i start thinking about what other people want to read, I get so confused that I just have to put my laptop on the other side of the room and stare at it. Blogging is like the ultimate socially acceptable version of talking to yourself...and how great for us that your internal monologue is fun!

    www.jbound.com

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  2. I think I write for myself, too. I do think about the fact that other people are reading (like my Mom) so I try not to share too much especially about my kids. But I have to write about things that are important to me and that I love.
    Thanks for posts like this!

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  3. I love this post more than anything else today (well nearly). Being new to blogging I am still trying to find the balance of writing for myself and writing for other people and it really isn't working for me.

    So, changing my mindset starting with my very next post!

    Thank you (times a million)!

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  4. I think i write for both me and my readers. I have to express myself or i will go postal, but I also like to make people laugh and smile. But i did at first write for others and not for myself and I felt so fake...and I just decided just to be myself since I am a writer at heart and at the end of the day I have to love what I wrote. I am not the most fashionable (I am on my good days), i am not that much of a cook, and i am definitely not a home designer, so I just accepted that I just have to be me and so far it works!

    Great post Erin!

    -Rekita

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  5. Loved this post and so needed to hear it today. Thank you for publishing for you so that your readers could enjoy. I love your blog and your thought process on this. Love love love.

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  6. this is good :) I actually just came up with a mission statement for my blog so I could remember why I'm writing :) it's something every blogger should do, in my opinion.

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  7. Overall, I think I'm writing for me, and for my future. But I think that a lot of times, I forget that, and worry about how many readers I have and how to get more.
    At some point, I think we all do it for others - to have some sort of recognition; but in the end, it needs to be for ourselves.
    <3 Kiersten

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  8. I write for myself. for our documentation. i love writing down our fun things. my fun things. my thoughts. obviously not a lot of people read my blog...so yes, I do do this for myself. And if others want to follow along, then join in on the craziness ;)

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  9. simply awesome. I blog for me but there are times that I hesitate and wonder what other will think, in those moments I walk away and refresh. I love blogging, I love reflecting, I love the depth it offers into my own life as well as others. We have so much to share and so much to learn. It's a beautiful thing. Love the quotes you used for this post. Hubs and I were talking over the weekend, we totally hit on that first quote. Couldn't be truer!

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  10. No matter who you write for, it's certainly an important question to ask yourself... a check yourself before you wreck yourself sort of thing. I think I ultimately do it for posterity but the community feels darn good. I hope you start feeling better!

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  11. Love this post. I write for my little family. A scrapbook on the web for my children one day. Thanks for writing!

    http://www.mmweissfamily.blogspot.com/2012/08/why-i-blog.html

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  12. loved the crap out of this post. there are blogs that i like and blogs that i genuinely love reading. (like good books and favorite books.) and the blogs that i genuinely love reading are blogs that are real. i really cannot stand when a blogger doesn't write for their own desire to write. i started my blog 4 flipping years ago because my life was happening, i wasn't documenting it, and my family (which was 2000 miles away) didn't know a lot about what was going on in it. less than a month after i began blogging, my life hit rock bottom and i have several drafted posts that i never published that document all of the ugly details of my life at that point. i have always blogged for me. i blogged back when not even my mom followed me. i blog now never thinking that anyone will take interest of it (and i'm always pleasantly surprised when they do.) yes, i promote it. and yes, i do love having followers. but even if they all unfollowed me, i would still blog. because i want to remember my life even if no one else does. :)

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  13. I write for myself. I'm really good when it comes to fantasy/historical fiction...but my poetry has lacked in the past 5 years and I've always struggled with creative non-fiction (personal essays, etc). So, I write to try and improve that. Also, I love journaling and blogging is like a photo-journal that you can have fun with!

    morrellfairytale.blogspot.com

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  14. Thank you for this post. Lately, I have been so wrapped up in growing my blog, and focusing on the numbers. Sometimes it's hard to remember why you started blogging in the first place: for the outlet, the creativity, the "me time." I forget about what I want to write sometimes, and write what others want to read, not necessarily what I want to write. Thanks for the reminder, the inspiration, and the sincerity.

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  15. Thank you for this post, Ive been questioning this myself as someone who is just starting out in the blogging land.

    I'm writing because I need to discover me, who I am, what I enjoy, my style, be ok with my failures and to be excited about my triumphs. And if someone happens to read it then awesome, support is a great thing.

    I'm looking forward to reading more of what you write about. If you are interested, here is me.

    Once Upon The Hill

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  16. My posts usually revolve around what is currently going on in my life.i write what you know and what I am experiencing. I'm a mom and right now my life pretty much is all about my kids. That's what I base a lot off of, thus the name of my blog :)
    www.unintentionalsahm.com

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  17. I love this more than I can even say. SO good. keep writing, friend.

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  18. Love this! I love reading and writing blogs but I think there can be a lot of unintentional comparing...especially for women. I love bloggers like you who just are real and who encourage othes to be real as well. So inspiring. Em

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  19. I love this! i always feel like i am just ranting in my blogpost! hopefully with time i can learn to become a better writer with time!I love your blog. thanks for being great

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  20. Fantastic words, girl. I write because I feel it is part of my calling. It's not for me, really...I think I write more for the heart who needs my words, whether it be for myself or someone else. :)

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  21. This is a great post. At the end of the day, even if know one reads what we write, we will have still created something!

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  22. LOVE this. I blog to keep myself creative. I feel like "real" life can get a little too real. With work and responsibilities this community keeps my creative spirit alive.

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  23. Love this post, it is a good question to ask: Why do you and who do you blog for? It seems like over the years the answer has changed for me. Very inspirational. Hope you enjoy a good nights sleep to recover for your day.

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  24. Though I blog for me (I find it entertaining and a challenge) I also blog for my mom. I love to give her a good laugh. Nothing is better than having her call me, after I've posted something, and she is barely able to talk from laughing so much. :)

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  25. Such a great post and yes, it makes total sense... I am very new to the blogging world and I may not be the best at it, but I love the way it has made me feel as a person. I hope you keep it all about you, cause, like myself, it makes for a happier you and it makes for one great blog that I enjoy reading. :)

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  26. Awesomely put into words Erin - and yes ALWAYS, always write for ourselves..So important!

    And THANK YOU!!!! For a great write up and lovely words and links to our blog - muchos appreciated, and welcome welcome welcome! xxx

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  27. I write for myself also. I really appreciated this post, it goes along so well with the concerns I personally have and expressed to you in our conversations. You can't please everyone. Also, I love Mumford also!

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  28. I don't blog so I am a good judge of good writers on blogs as I am a writere. I love this post because it speaks of finding your creative self. Its a daily struggl with writers to go within among all the chatter of the world. Some of our best work comes from the worse days. Your blog is one that speaks of good writing and being a true writer as you speak honestly.

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  29. well said. it's the act of writing! thanks for putting this out there.

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  30. This post was so needed this morning. I have to say I have walked on a thin line over the past few months trying to decided why I blog and who I blog for. It all just kind of fell in my lap but then all of a sudden I fell in love with it. Writing about things I love and things that inspire me, bring me joy. Sometimes I think I just have to remember not to take it too seriously!

    X Kenzie

    www.CaveGirlintheCity.com

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  31. Erin, this post came at the perfect time. I've always enjoyed writing and a few years back I got the opportunity to write little opinion essays online for a local site. To my surprise, I actually got great support from friends and strangers alike, but life happened and I stopped.

    Recently, I had decided that I was going to start writing again - why? Because I love to write. However, this time I would try my hand at blogging, so I started to research this whole "blogging" thing and found you! Trying to figure out what to write and who my target audience would be was needless to say, "stressing" me out, because in all honestly, I just want to write. I have been stuck with the fear of "what do I write?" That I wasn't writing, so thank you.

    Thank you for asking this very important question. I want to write for myself, and if people enjoy what they read that's great, but I'm doing this for me.

    (Btw, this is my first time ever commenting on someones blog....thanks for the inspiration.)

    I'm still in the process of making my blog "my own", but I welcome your thoughts.

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  32. Blogging aside, there is a powerful truth in this post...a rudder we can all use as we navigate through life. "If I am pleasing everybody, I am probably not being true to myself." Such wisdom, Erin. Thank you for sharing.

    Kim

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  33. Love this post Erin. I'm in the same camp as you. I love my readers, but I write first and foremost for me. The fact that people read and enjoy it is just a complete bonus.

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  34. I love this post. I write, first and foremost for me, but I post mostly what I think my readers will enjoy. Lately I have been trying to write more in line with my background and balance it with lifecasting posts. This has meant an interesting mix of wedding planning, feminism, and random musings (all while listening to Mumford or Belle and Sebastian, of course). It makes for, I think, a more interesting read, and lets me process things through writing, even if I am not going to share.

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  35. Love this post!!! That's the right attitude. I definitely write for me too. I love it that I have people who enjoy reading and commenting but I didn't always. I used to write with zero feedback and zero followers but I kept doing it just because I loved to. Even now I don't have a lot of followers, I don't always get a lot of comments and it's hard not to compare myself to bloggers that have kazillion followers. I don't market my blog like a business because I don't really think of it that way. I keep taking myself back to why I started in the first place and that was for me.

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  36. Great post! I think you have the perfect perspective when it comes to blogging. Although I've only been blogging for one year, looking back at those posts, and the memories I was able to capture whether through images or words, makes my heart warm. It's funny how much you can forget in just one year (or maybe not funny, but more so tragic) and I am so thankful that I do this crazy, obsessive, time consuming hobby because it helps me remember the best of the best.

    I think at the end of the day, most of us blog for ourselves. The connection and community is just an added bonus. We feed our fellow bloggers need to reflect on life, love, tragedy, funny moments with every comment we leave to them saying, "I hear you..keep writing." Blogging truly is an amazing thing.

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  37. Yep. Yep. Yep! I struggle sitting down in front of my blog because I don't offer "different" in the way the world of blogging expects different. I have talents, but I'm not specialized. I just love to share with others about this crazy and beautiful thing called life.

    I'm not a blogger of many followers. That's OK. I like my space for writing. I love the people too, but I love the space where I can pour out myself on "paper."

    Thanks for the post :)

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  38. I find that when people write for themselves, I'm more apt to read what they write. Of course, I like the funny bloggers, or the sarcastic ones, but the people who write for themselves (who may also be sarcastic & funny) I feel like I can actually connect with them and get to know them. And I love that about blogging.

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  39. Beautiful post, Erin... from a beautiful girl on the inside and out. I normally read your posts straight from my email in box, so I haven't visited your actual site in a while. I love the new design... Very similar to the previous, just more neat and clean :). I hope you are doing well.... Love, love this heartfelt inspirational, true to yourself post.
    Whitley
    www.thequeencitystyle.com

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  40. Love your post. I'm a new blogger and started my blog because I love writing and connecting with people. It genuinely is something that I've enjoyed doing and look forward to continuing. Great post!
    Adrienne

    myblackwhitecolor.blogspot.com

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  42. I think I have (just) started writing because I have seen how powerful the blogging community is, and I wanted to in some way be a part of that. Sure, a big part of reading blogs is just for entertainment value- and that's most of what keep me coming back every single day. But it amazes me when I see that big post every so often that makes me think... Wow, this could change someones life. Or make someone realize they are not alone in the world. Or even save their life, really. I think your post on anxiety, for example, was one of those BIG ones that really help people :)

    https://somesnapshots.wordpress.com/

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  43. I blog for me. I have to, otherwise what point is there? Yes I take into consideration what I'm writing about and I pay attention a little more now that my mom and some of her coworkers are reading, but I still write for me. It's cathartic. It's a way to keep memories, to actually see how I've (hopefully) grown as a person.

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  44. I go through this same thing every few months. I start to think about what I could write that would get more readers to my page, and then I stop and think, "Wait, I shouldn't be writing for anyone but me!" It's easy to get swept up in the chaos of blogging. But it's great that we have a community of people who will love us no matter what! :)

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  45. Erin, i am so in love with this post. You are so honest and open, i love that.

    Why do I write? Because I need a reminder of who I am. I get lost sometimes. I work, I wife, I mother, I run errands, I cook, I clean and up until last july, I did that all without ever nurturing my brain, my mind or my creativity. but when i started my blog, it was like brain food. link ups with questions, telling people about myself, giving my opinion, it was all a wake up call to what was missing: my creativity and my personality! I have to remind myself alot about how it felt to start my blog and all those great feelings about getting my thoughts out of my brain and in front of me. remembering that keeps me on the road of doing it for me, which in turn, gives back because of the friends i meet and new things from other bloggers than inspire me.

    That felt good to write, thanks Erin! ;)

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  46. Love this post! This is a question that has been on my heart and mind a lot lately! I've been trying to find my voice which I feel like can change depending on my purpose for writing. So thank you for your thoughts and insight on why you write.

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I read and appreciate every one of your comments. Thanks for stopping by my space and sharing a piece of yourself on this huge ole internet. I meant that in the least creepy way possible. I'm just good at making everything awkward. Anyhow, thank you for your comments. They make me smile :)