2.21.2013

Late Night Thoughts On Love & Respect


**this post was wrote Wednesday night around midnight..it should be mentioned that the first paragraph turned out to be a complete lie. I ended up making a breakfast casserole at 1:30 am after finishing this post..what can I say, I am a party animal**
 
I knew that previously mentioned coffee would keep me up into the wee hours of the night. 
To clarify, "wee hours" means 11:45 in these parts. Anything past 1:00 am would be considered asinine. I don't do asinine. Anyhow, here I sit with a million and twenty thoughts roaming around in that head of mine so I thought maybe I should just get em' out while they are fresh. Kinda like McDonalds fries minus the fresh part. And now I just want McDonalds french fries. 
 
So back to what is roaming around in that mind of mine. It's this whole love, respect, opinions, supporting, tearing down, encouraging, judging, etc thing. I am pretty confident that the inspiration behind this post is stemming from this and this. Both of which are posts that were written by two people I totally respect and admire. They are on two totally unrelated topics (one "real life" lessons and one "blogging life" opinions) but both provoked thoughts in that head of mine today.
 
Here's the thing. We as individuals are all different. We will never all do something the same way, believe the same things, express our emotions exactly how the person next to us expresses their emotions. We will make decisions that others wouldn't, and we will say things that not everybody will always agree with.  We are different. And it's the most beautiful thing. Can you imagine how mundane this life would it be if we ALL ran our relationships/blogs/houses/lives exactly alike?
How we would learn, grow, and evolve as people? 
 
With that being said, I feel like I am learning more and more about what a fine line there is between stating your opinion vs expressing your thoughts out of love and respect. It's something that I want to be more aware of. I have freely offered up my opinions and advice many times..many times not from a place of love and understanding. This is true in both "real life" and "blogging life". As an example, I once published a post about "what not to do" The title alone makes me cringe. I do not know all. Why should it genuinely matter to me how you run your blog? Isn't it enough to admit the fact that hey--I don't agree with anything that was just written in that post, but the way she put her heart, soul, time, and energy behind it is absolutely admirable?! Shouldn't we as people be quick to point out what we love instead of what we don't? 
 
Other thoughts come to my head. Religion..I believe in Jesus, you may not. Money...I like to splurge on myself  from time to time, you may think this is selfish. I choose not to swear, you may cuss like a sailor. Drinking..I love having an alcoholic drink most evenings, you may think this means I have a problem. Blogging..I choose to monetize mine, you may never have this desire. I laugh at things 4 year olds laugh at, you may think this is immature. Diet...I eat horribly, you may find this disgusting. 
 
 
We are so quick to criticize, think we know the "right way to do things", bash others publicly for their decisions..but what if we were quick to learn why somebody does/think what they do and look at it as a possible learning opportunity? What if we didn't complain about something that somebody else does that bothers us and instead point out something that you admire about them? What if we would ask each other to explain our differences to each other instead of closing off our minds because we already "know they are wrong?" What if we tried to meet people where they are at instead of telling them where they should be? 
 
 
I want to be more aware of this. Slow to speak, quick to listen. I want to encourage, not tear down. 
I just feel like there is SO much room for growth for me in this department and really for people as a whole.
 
I want to live with an attitude of love. 
 
We all need it, why not give it? 
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36 comments:

  1. This is so perfectly said and rings ever so true. We are all created differently and thank God we were. I'd be pretty boring if there were more than one of me. You on the other hand? ;) I love that each of us bring something different to the table, in this difference we should find love and encouragement. I needed this post and didn't even know it, we can all use reminders every now and again. Thanks for the truth!

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  2. So right on! I love your open mind and flexibility in your thoughts. I think that is what life and happiness is all about!
    Nicely done!
    www.smileandwrite1.blogspot.com

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  3. I think this was a beautiful post! And definitely something we all should be reminded of! No matter how hard we try to be the best person we can be and treat others with respect and love, we all fail at some point or another. Thanks for the reminder to watch what I say and how I say it and show more love! :) Hope you're having a great day!

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  4. This is a great post. It made me tear up & ironically enough think of John Lennon a la LET IT BE. Everyone's entitled to their own happiness.

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  5. I also read those two posts earlier this week, and both affected me in two totally different ways. I love everything you had to say, Erin. We are all so different, but that uniqueness is oftentimes what creates the beauty in life! And we should always strive to share our opinions with love and respect. When you don't, you alienate people...and isn't that kinda the opposite of what a blog is about? Inviting people into your lives and hearts, not alienating them.

    And I must add, this post is very well articulated for a midnight writing session. I'm impressed!!! I tell my boss that I have dyslexia before 9am and after 9pm. Hence the reason I misspelled the word "security" in an proposal submitted at 8am today. It wasn't my fault. It was my morning dyslexia ;)

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  6. I love this post and I hope you know that my post was meant to let bloggers know that they dont have to spend money to gain readership. That its completely okay to JUST BLOG for the FUN of it. That this community isnt all about followers and giveaways. It was never meant to tear others down. It was meant to lift the ladies up that dont have the funds to sponsor in hope of gaining new readers.

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    1. Yes!! I think your points were great...it is oh so true what you had to say and I do think you had a lot of great reminders in there for new bloggers, established bloggers, etc. It was good for me to read :)

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  7. I agree 100%... i feel its our society and the urge to express opinions in an ineloquent way! But what do i know right?! :) Keep doin' what your doin!

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  8. I agree with you totally. I might not agree with everything you do/say or others blogs I may follow. You are YOU - and thats what makes this blogging world so much fun. Just cause other bloggers are different from us is no reason to tear them down.

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  9. Why oh Why, can't there be a LIKE button on this!
    L♥VE this post:)

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  11. Agreed! People can stand to be a little nicer to each other both in real life & on the www as you suggest. For instance, many people will write absolutely anything online... I have seen some amazing posts that lead to negative, horrible comments, which is so sad because I think that it takes so much bravery to blog honestly, and people should be respectful of that, and try to state their opinion kindly :)

    http://somesnapshots.wordpress.com/

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  12. Beautiful post! I was nodding along as I read through this. The idea of the individual has been so interesting to me as of late - we are all SO different. We each have SUCH different stories, different backgrounds, different hopes and desires for the future. Who are we to judge? Thanks for writing this! :)

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  13. This is GOOD. I love reading your blog because it is always uplifting and encouraging....I am struggling right now trying to figure out if I should keep at this and what direction to go in if I do and writers like you are what make me want to try to be a contributing part of this community... I just don't know if I'm interesting enough to do it :) Thanks for sharing your thoughts! Em

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  14. Loved this....a lot. There are so many reasons people do the things they do and it is hard to feel you are being judged for it. I think we all need to look into our own hearts and if it feels right to do something, then do it...if not, then don't. Especially with blogging, there are so many "rules" and depending on your goals these so called rules may not apply. Great post!

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  15. Great post. It can be so difficult sometimes to be patient and listen before forming--and even stating--opinions. What we're passionate about defines who we are, and sharing that is brave and beautiful. But the same is true for the girl on the blog next door. You said it so well--it's nice to know that there's someone in the blogging community with this attitude. Even if you're not perfect at putting it into practice, having your heart in the right place is a great start.

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  16. "Slow to speak. Quick to listen." Be looking for a future DIY project from me featuring this quote. I love it and want to see it every day! Loved, loved this post! I also love that you addressed an issue without hurtful words. Wonderful!

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  17. I completely agree with the content and context of this post. I for one decided to change my sponsorship options because of what did/didn't work for me. I eliminated sidebar ads, but it doesn't mean I don't throw my blog's face out there once in a while! I think investment in what you're passionate about is important! Everyone's passions and purposes are different, and that we have to accept and respect. We also cannot compare ourselves to other bloggers and criticize them for what they do. Yes, Yes, Yes! I love this post. So many good things. We cannot please all of our readers, we are the queens of our blogs :).

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  18. I adore you. This post ... hits home with me so so so much. :)

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  19. I love this, and I agree wholeheartedly.... I love the excitement that the differences between myself and others around me brings, I think it keeps things interesting and makes me a better person to learn and understand what others believe or how they live. That being said, I remind myself from time to time because I am a little more judgy of those closest to me when they don't agree or do what I want and I have to remind myself that just because they are my family, or spouse, the same 'rule' applies and they are still an individual with different wiring than myself. Fab post as always Erin. :)

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  20. I agree! Everyone is different and different doesn't mean better or worse. . . just different. Thanks for posting this.

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  21. AMEN. AMEN. AMEN. Love this so much, Erin! That's all. :)

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  22. Wow.. you don't hold back on the late night coffee... And I love the outcome! Haha.. This post is terrific! It even made me get all mushy mush with my hubby sitting next to me watching TV while I read it. ;)

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  23. LOve this post!!! Great great post (i said that twice;) Erin i am so happy you shared your heart on all of this. It takes courage and girl you are a courageous woman that i admire:) God bless you!

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  24. "Slow to speak, quick to listen" ...this is a philosophy I've tried, and will continue to try, to practice everyday. Said it before, and I'll say it again...love, love, love it.

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  25. Great post, this is why people love you're blog- you're honesty and integrity.

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  26. I am going to print this off and put it next to my computer as a great reminder to just be genuine."I want to be more aware of this. Slow to speak, quick to listen. I want to encourage, not tear down.
    I just feel like there is SO much room for growth for me in this department and really for people as a whole." Thanks for this Erin. Well Done

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  27. AMENNNNNNNNNN sister amen amen amen// you know my thoughts on this :). People that love other bloggers well, their readers well- those people are true treasures. I adore you and respect you so much. And you know my opinions....if putting your name out there leads to an introduction which leads to a follow which leads to over a million pageviews a month and a loyal following then to each his own :).

    Keep sharing that beautiful heart of yours.

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  28. This is probably going to come off wrong, but I think it's great that you were able t recognize this as something you yourself need to work on. That right there is a big deal. I completely agree though. We all do things differently and that is the beauty of the human race. My favorite part was "What if we tried to meet people where they are at instead of telling them where they should be?" True words, Erin. Very true words.

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  29. Hey lady! I'm hosting a giveaway today for a $75 credit at MINTED.COM! Be sure to enter! :)

    http://jaxandmarbles.blogspot.com/2013/02/mintedcom-giveaway.html

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  30. Very well said, I've been a long time reader and have loved your blog. You have a great mindset and I hope that others follow suit!

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  31. The part of this post where you shared details about who you are and how other people might perceive you makes me think that the best, most surprising part of blogging is that what people bravely reveal about themselves in their writing is often such a departure from what their pinterest boards and instagram photos suggest. There are the "perfect", martha stewart moms who can laugh at their failed DIY attempts; the devoutly religious people who like to drink or have potty mouths; the woman covered in tattoos who has never drank a day in her life. I love connecting with people I never thought I'd relate to, and appreciate that without their honesty I'd probably never realize that we are all so alike, even in our differences. Thanks for this post and for your blog in general, which provides so much support and encouragement for all of the other bloggers out there.

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  32. Another wonderful post. Thanks for all that you do and write!

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  33. What a great post. I love a good honest post. Cheers to you.

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I read and appreciate every one of your comments. Thanks for stopping by my space and sharing a piece of yourself on this huge ole internet. I meant that in the least creepy way possible. I'm just good at making everything awkward. Anyhow, thank you for your comments. They make me smile :)