Our Pets Heads Are Falling Off...

Hey friends--it's me again.
Technically speaking its me, my Caramel Apple Spice drink from Starbucks, and Hunter Hayes on Pandora Radio. Hunter and I..we've really hit it off lately, me and him.
Something I never expected to happen...he just makes me feel so.....
{Hi Hunter. Goochie goochie goo}

It's amazing what seeing somebody live will do to ya.....
In fact, it's pretty comparable to the time I saw my bird (Tweety) fly into a wall and watch it's head fall off. Because of that I now I appreciate Dumb and Dumber so much more. Pretty bird....
That was me. On Valentines Day. Except my bird's head was swinging in my sister's hair.
RIP Tweety.

Anyhow--I have NO clue how I got on that subject.
I do know what I was going to tell you though--that Caramel Apple Spice drink.
Everybody--leave your seats, go to your nearest Starbucks, and order one. Stat.
If Heaven came in cup form, this would be it.
Additionally so--if 90 extra pounds ever came in a cup, this would be it.
Screw the calories.
That's my motto.
It doesn't really work so don't start saying it...unless you would like to be 90 pounds heavier.
In which case--screw the calories.

K well listen up--I have a one hour massage to get to.
And if I know anything about blogging it is this--never attempt to write a blog post after a massage.
Unless you want your forehead to do the typing for you....

While I am off getting oiled and rubbed down, I'd like you to meet this special girl.
Ashley is one of the first blogs I actually read {and continue to read} after I started blogging.
She is sweet, real, beautiful, and most importantly--ghetto.
Four traits that are a must to be a best friend.
Thankfully for me--I will be meeting Ashley in the living flesh this October.
You should be jealous.

Ashley, take it away giiiiiiiiirl.
Hooty Hoo, Living in Yellow Readers wait, is hooty hoo not cool anymore? Was it ever?
My name is Ashley and I blog over at 5ohWifey: life as a mommy and cop's wife.
Ok, pause. Yes, I'm already pausing this post but I feel the need to clarify something.
When I started my little blog I knew I was going to write about the Hubby's job. Probably a lot.
So I thought I came up with a witty and adorable name that as soon as people so it they would be like "Oh, police wife.. I get it... gosh she's clever". But that hasn't happened.
I've been asked a bunch of times what on earth my name means... even by 5ohHubby's mother... so I thought I'd just clear things up once and for all.
5ohWifey as in 5-0 as in the standard call sign for police as in Hawaii five 0. 
Yes, I know that if you have to explain it it isn't funny. So.... awkward I am amazed every day by what God is doing in my life despite my lack of a clever blog title.

I am a southern girl now living in California against my will.
I am the wife of 5ohHubby who is a police officer and wonderful man and no that's not mutually exclusiveI am a stay at home mom to an amazing little girl I call 5ohBaby and she is seriously fabulous. We have probably the cutest, ugly dog out there (5ohPup). 
I think I'm pretty funny and sometimes other people do, too. Not as funny as Erin, but.... ya know. 
I have a BA from Florida State (Go Noles!) that started out as an English Degree, ended up a social science degree, and is now being used as a MRS degree because I don't work now... see how I did that? 
Basically I paid FSU lots and lots o' cash to meet the man of my dreams and be the back up plan in case 5ohHubby decides his days of runnin' and gunnin' are over and he'd rather be a stay at home dad and all the police wives laughed.
She sure is cute, huh? I know.. I made her from scratch. Don't worry though... she isn't always this stinking cute. Once, her eye swelled completely closed and she straight up looked like Quasimodo. S
eriously you can go check it out here. That was a face only a mother could love.
And mock... Only a mother could mock.
Okthat's rotten. But you know what? I don't have it all together. Hey, you cant do it all. Sometimes, I take inappropriate pirate-y pictures mocking my daughters 3 day hospital stay. Sometimes, I accidentally feed my baby jalapenos. Sometimes, I pray inappropriate and hilarious Tina Fey Prayers for her. But y'all, I love that girl like nobodies business and I'm pretty sure stuff like this puts the "hood" in mommy hood seriously what is with the ghetto references?
I do other things besides totally mess up being a mom. I bribe other travelers with chocolate on plain rides even though 5ohBaby is seriously an angel to travel with. I wrestle with the hardships that come with being a police wife and I talk about some of the funnier stories I get to hear. Every so often I put up a stupid simple and ridiculously delicious recipe for random things like stuffed meatballs and cheesy polenta. I don't know why but I keep posting awkward and mostly unhelpful mommy style fashion posts. Also? Lots of adorable pictures of 5ohBaby
So lets re pop a cap, shall we? ok ok i'm done with the white girl ghetto references. 
Not-as-witty-as-I-thought blog title. Check. Adorable baby I made from scratch who gives me grace as I stumble my way through parenthood. Check. Husband who is pretty awesome with a super cool and often challenging job. Check. Self deprecating sense of humor. Check. If any of this interests you I'd love for you to come on over to 5ohWifey and say Hi. If it doesn't interest you, stop by anyways and tell me because, lets be real, that's why I'm here in the first place.
Seriously I'm not serious.
You know what is exciting about all of this?
I am hiring Ashley to concieve my baby.
You saw how cute that little thing is didn't you?
I haven't necessarily confirmed these details with her yet...nor my husband, but again, those are just details.
Anyhow, go say whuddddup to Ashley over here.
And then stay around there forever.
Your life just got better.
You are welcome.



  1. So that sounds DELICIOUSLY AMAZING!!! The drink I mean.. 5OhWifey sounds pretty sweet too. ;)

  2. Hunter Hayes = amazing! Love him! He's a Louisianian like me :) Didn't you just fall in lurve with his CMA performance? I died in that stadium just listening to his voice! Oh my! Hottness...!

  3. Love 5ohwifeys blog! She is hilarious! And imma need that Starbucks drink in my hand NOW!

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  6. thoroughly amused by you both! :) off to check out the 5oh-blog!

  7. just read about Tweety...as I was taking a sip of my drink...just about choked! Haha, love your posts, Erin!

  8. Did you see Hunter Hayes live? I saw him in January with Rascal Flatts. Let's just say he's my future husband! Voice of Rascal Flatts and face of Ryan Reynolds. Oh my gosh. (That was the teenage girl coming out of me hahah)

  9. I need to try that! The closest starbucks is 40 minutes ;( wahh!

  10. Ok, as stated above from Chelsea , I nearly choked when I read about Tweety. These things seem to happen to you! :) Thanks for letting 5oh post, I am a cops wifey, too and now have someone else to follow! Can't WAIT to try out the Starbucks drink. *mouth watering*

  11. Um what the heck is this delicious drink you speak of!?!?!?!? I am in upstate NY and we only have Dunkin Donuts here. Is it a Starbucks drink out right now or do I have to put in a special order? ahh. must.have.now.

  12. Thank god I live in Seattle and there are 3 Starbucks within walking distance because I NEED that drink NOW!

  13. Meeting her in October as in you both will be at Influence conference? If so, that rocks my stinkin' socks off! I will be there too!

  14. I'll definitely check out her blog. Such a cute picture of her little girl.

  15. Your blog title made me laugh out as soon as it popped on my news feed...I knew I loved your blog for a reason!

  16. My first bird was also Tweety! :)

  17. oh my gosh poor bird. Hilarious movie. and I love 5 oh wifey!

  18. Thanks for thi intro, Erin!
    Think I love her already!!

  19. that latte looks soooooooo good!

  20. I seriously just lol-ed at the bird thing {sorry about your bird} but seriously? How does that happen? and I couldn't help myself, you tied it into dumb and dumber... You both are some funny ladies!
    I'm a new follower to this fun little blog of yours! =)


I read and appreciate every one of your comments. Thanks for stopping by my space and sharing a piece of yourself on this huge ole internet. I meant that in the least creepy way possible. I'm just good at making everything awkward. Anyhow, thank you for your comments. They make me smile :)