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Honest Talk.

July 20, 2012

By:

Erin Schrader

Pull up a chair, make yourself comfortable, and let’s talk.
Actually, allow me to talk. Prepare to listen. Or read. Or whatever you do when you look at my blog.
So yeah—keep drinking or going to the bathroom.
Side note—if you are going to the bathroom while you read my blog…never mind. I don’t want to think about that anymore.
Anyhow—I feel that it’s time for a good ole fashion post of honesty.
I know that I show up to this blog 99% of the time with the goal to make you laugh, whether that be by making fun of myself, or making fun of you {pysch. I would never make fun of you. Unless you are going to the bathroom right now…in which case I am totally calling you out}. But today I just want to be open and honest with how I am really feeling.

This week has been a hard week.

Life has been happening. And it hasn’t been all good.

Now before I go on much further, I should reiterate something—I am filled with joy and I thank the good Lord above that regardless of how much stress and/or hurt I feel, I still have a lingering joy just hanging out in my bones. But with that being said, I have felt stressed with a capital S this week.
Stress that has caused me to have a constant stomach for 5 days straight.

Which really has been great for weight loss, but other than that—not good at all.

Sunday evening my mother-in-law’s boyfriend of 5+ years passed away from complications of a motorcycle accident. And while we were not super close, it affects me. And it affects the lives of people around me.

Death is such a weird thing. We went to dinner with her last night, and the whole time I just kept having to remind myself while we sat there and talked “he is no longer living…he will no longer be at our holiday/birthday celebrations…he really is no longer around.” And it makes me sad.

On top of that, there are other things happening around me that are taking a toll on me mentally and emotionally. I do not think it is my responsibility to discuss details on this blog so I am not going to say much more. But it’s hard. And I don’t think there has been a day in the last week that I haven’t cried at least a little bit.

So that’s where I’m at right now and how I am feeling.
Stressed. Emotional. Stomach ached out. And somehow still joyful.

It is in times like these where I am reminded of this lesson over and over again…

This week from the outside you would think everything is great—but inside is a different story.

I have a feeling it is like that for a lot of people more times than you would think—so just remember that important lesson above.

Thank you for allowing me to just sit back and talk today. It feels good. And I like good.

Have yourself a happy weekend kids.

We’re off to partake in viewings, funerals, and a big ole party afterwards….just the way he would want it.

Love you all.  

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