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This Amount Of Pictures Should Be Illegal.

May 11, 2012

By:

Erin Schrader

We are continuing on the breakin’ down our trip day by day.
If you missed the first recap, you can find that here.  If you could care less, continue on.

Day 4:  My body thought it would be a good idea to remind me that I am in fact a woman, and that indeed-I have a menstrual cycle. Kind of a raw deal on my end because I don’t remember inviting her to come along. Anyhow, I don’t know why I just told you readers all of this. Maybe so that when I say “I wanted to kill myself on this morning” it makes more sense. Yes, that’s why.
Also to explain why I woke up and the first thing I did was this. #inhaledlikeachamp.

Thankfully my body got over the hating me stage and kicked into full out hyper mode come evening. All it took was a macaroni and cheese deep fried ball of amazingness, cucumber martini, a drum circle with a bunch of hippies dancing around on the beach, and frozen yogurt to do the trick.

My husband just adores when I am hyper. He really adores when I sing really loud in public in the most awful voice ever. Oh, and when I make him take pictures of me doing ridiculous poses in public. Anything to make him happy.

Day 5: Started off the day by house shopping. We settled on this one.

We’re just praying now that the Realtor accepts our $99,000 offer.
On this particular day I also thought it would be cute to slick my hair back as tight as possible. I would hate to get mistaken as one of those “cutesy girls” who lays out with a full face of make-up and hair done, so to ensure I don’t, I look as ugly as possible. I think it worked.

I also thought it would be a genius idea to not apply one lick of sunscreen on this last day. Friends, do not make this stupid mistake. I wound up with sun poisoning all over the top of my feet. Holy itch. On the bright side, the whole no sunscreen thing did generate some serious tan lines. And some hurt shoulders. Ya win some ya lose some. Sun-1 Erin-0.

After getting beat up by the rays, we wound up on set of an MTV TV show. Details here. Take a look at the behind the scenes of a “hidden camera reality show”.

Is it just me or were those cameras not hidden? Thanks a lot MTV for making me look like an idiot all of those times I defended shows like yours. 

Regardless of my broken heart, we still had a fantastic last evening partaking in happy hour//shopping//dinner on the water//and snapping a million and ten pictures.

Can I just tell you that in reality, it was pretty much completely dark out when these pictures were taken. My camera somehow picked up a little bit of light and generated these masterpieces. We were such proud little parents of our camera for 20 minutes. She is such a good little girl sometimes.

Day 6: I love when my pillows boss me around.

After obeying it for a long while, we thought it was a good idea to try to lose 1 of the 39 pounds we gained by going on a 3 mile walk. If only I could do this every day.

After packing up and crying inside, we went to the outlet malls.
Do you know how un-cool it is go to an outlet mall when you are on a shopping freeze? Don’t try it.

I look like an Ostrich. This I know.

And then, just like these birds—we got the flock out of there.

…And here we are. Back in Indiana with peeling shoulders and fading tan lines.

Good times. Great Memories.

Husband—thank you for this little getaway. I had so much fun with you and just you. I love these moments alone to reconnect, to laugh, to learn, and to most of all, to love. Oh and I can’t forget, thank you for walking in on the old woman peeing on the airplane with her pants around her ankles.
You always know how to put a smile on my face. Love you.

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