2.17.2011

Awkward & Awesome Thursdays! Volume 3


    Awkward 
  1. Observing somebody trip and fall. Do you laugh, offer to help, or ignore it like it never happened so you avoid making them feel even more embarrassed than they already are? Stumps me every time.
  2. Answering a phone call at work to hear the other person on the line PEEING. Do you wait for them to finish or talk as though you don’t hear their steady stream in the background?  Holy awkward. Thank you supplying me with something to blog about valued member. I do not make this stuff up people. 
  3. Having a store alarm go off when I am exiting. What exactly do you do in that situation? Keep walking and appear to be a criminal to everybody in sight or find the nearest store associate to pat you down? Neither option is desirable.
  4. Non-stop smirking while talking to a guy because of something that had JUST happened before I struck up this conversation. Now that guy is suddenly smirking back and I just know he thinks I have an instant crush on him. Woopsie. There is no way to bring clarification to these types of situations..”I really don’t have a crush on you, I swear I am smiling at something else…”. I’ll save myself that awkward moment of convincing.
  5. Talking with a co-worker about the color of the shirt she is wearing and she states "It is not pink, I hate pink!" Just so happens I was wearing pink that day...allllrighty then.
  6. Watching other people lick their fingers after eating. You know it’s awkward.
  7. Last Thursday I made reference to an awkward co-habitation bathroom experience. This week I was lucky enough to hear a female grunt in a public restroom while I was exiting. Yup, this week’s moment tops last.
  8. People talking in 3rd person jargon. I just don’t get it. And it creeps me out. Just saying..
  9. This past week at a restaurant we witnessed a couple getting engaged. My giving friend suggested we order them a dessert to celebrate. We informed the waitress we would like to do so (thinking this would be anonymous). She apparently didn’t get the hint because she proceeded to march over to their table and POINT to us telling them we would like to order a dessert. The rest of the evening was full of waves & head nods back and forth with them mouthing “Thank You” the whole time. It was awkward people, trust me.
  10. How I looked when I was 15 years old. Thank you friends and family for failing to mention I wore so much eyeliner you couldn’t see my eyeballs. Lord, please protect my children from such mishaps.
            

      Awesome
  1. My ears spotted the sound of candy being opened at work. Those same ears landed me a free lemon drop. Thank you ears for your amazing candy opening instincts.
  2. Michael Jordan. Need I say more? Well, I will. Too say I was obsessed when I was younger would be an understatement. I would only allow myself to wear anything that was plastered with MJ. This to normal people would fall under the awkward category but I still consider it pretty awesome sooo, this is where it’s stickin peeps.
  3. Well my niece has managed to make her way into my Thursday posts the past two weeks so I will keep the tradition going. This week she decided it would be a good idea to start acting like a dog, because duh, why isn’t that a good idea? She now sticks my sister’s glove into her mouth and lets it hang out while she crawls around, imitating how a dog would have a rope hanging out of its mouth. At what age does stuff like this stop being acceptable?
  4. Getting ready for the day and my husband looks at me, says “You like good today” aaannnddd raises his eyebrows at the same time. Double wham. Good morning to you too baby cakes ;)
  5. Prank calls. Yes, I am 24 and no, they do not get old. Guarantee I will be that mom dialing numbers with my children as I sit in the corner and chuckle my brains out. Can. Not. Wait.
  6. The homemade card that my hubby made me for V-Day. I so desperately wish I could post a picture but he made me swear to blog secrecy that I wouldn’t. Boo. Still the cutest card in the entire world though, trust me folks.
  7. The one hour massage I got this week. To be still and allow my mind to wander off to "nothing land" is absolutely wonderful. I love that my husband never argues about spending money on massages and I am so beyond happy to have a friend who went to massage school. Thanks BT, you are so skilled.
  8.  Fist pounding my boss when I do something good. Who needs a raise when you can “blow it up”?  
  9. The temps have gone from this to this (see below). I can actually run outside without feeling like a knife is slicing my throat. Hallelujah, thank you Jesus. Calves and buttocks-take note & get ready to be transformed..I have high hopes for these babies. What a diff. 1 week makes 
  10. Saying “Isn’t it funny how close we are to (fill in the blank with a place you want to go to)??” to Shawn while we are driving along. “I mean that is weird how close we are, aanndd it sounds so good right now too…funny huh??” He is a sucker for it every time. Try it when you want to get something, it is nearly impossible to say no to (sneaky, sneaky I know). This is how I score random stops at Starbucks, Panera, or Target.
  11.   My sister’s new blog, Nesting Time <--Check it. She is everything I am not (mentioned in the first paragraph of this post). She is a mother..faaab mother at that, creative..like she actually knows how to make something out of nothing, and probably the nicest woman I have ever met. It’s a good thing I love her because she has already beat me hands down in best blog of 2011 (Because I am assuming we will be in the running for that of course).  Oh, and it’s only been up and running for a whopping 4 days?!! Talent sis, pure talent.
                
                The creator of Nesting Time and her little squirt, Claire


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5 comments:

  1. First- I LAUGHED MY STINKING HEAD OFF DURING THIS ENTIRE POST! Second, again, you are WAY too good for my ego... and definitely exaggerate my good qualities! Third, well, I forget my third point. But after this post, I could NEVER beat you for best blog!

    Love you... keep the laughter coming!

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  2. I've been waiting for this post! It makes my Thursdays!

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  3. Oh yeah, I remembered my third point... we DID try to let you know that we couldn't see your eyeballs with all that makeup! You just didn't listen to us :)

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  4. I LOVE that pic of your 15 year old self. priceless! I just did a post on my awkward years! haha to funny.

    savannah-joyofliving.blogspot.com

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  5. All I can say is that I actually laughed out loud when I saw the pic of you and Shawn!!! HA HA HA

    Cute!

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I read and appreciate every one of your comments. Thanks for stopping by my space and sharing a piece of yourself on this huge ole internet. I meant that in the least creepy way possible. I'm just good at making everything awkward. Anyhow, thank you for your comments. They make me smile :)