2.24.2011

Awkward & Awesome Thursday Volume 4


Awkward
1. Putting on a shirt for the day and realizing the size sticker is still plastered running down the front. This wouldn’t be so bad if I hadn’t worn it before, but I have. More than once. Thank you everybody who failed to mention this. On the bright side, I now have multiple people who won’t even have to ask my size when purchasing my Christmas gifts this year.

2. Thinking somebody is waving at you so you wave back all cheerfully and then notice they were waving at the person behind you. Usually you realize this by the confused face the waver gives or by the group of friends with the waver that is busting up laughing. I love witnessing this happen to other people. It might be one of my favorite things.

3. Having a member ask me if I can give him our routing number (FAQ in my line of work), and I respond back simply with “Oh yes”. He says “You make that sound sexy.” Okay two things: 1.Yuck, weird, awkward. I think there may be something lacking in your love life? Just saying. 2. If a routing number gets you fired up just wait and see what an account number will do to ya ;) Pssssych

4. Meeting somebody in person for the first time and they begin to tell you something about themselves. All the while you are nodding your head and respond back with “Yeah, I saw in your Spring Break 2009 photo album on facebook you did that..” I continually fall victim to this. There really isn’t anything more cringe worthy than suddenly realizing you just made yourself look like the biggest facebook creeper on the planet.
                                       

5. Meeting a little baby for the first time and not knowing if it is a boy or girl. I am sure having the parents hear “Auwww…it is so cute, what’s its name??” makes them feel real proud. Sorry parentals, just please make sure you label your baby boy or girl if there is any question of what sex your child is. Please and thank you. This will save both of us many awkward moments in the future.

6. Taking self portraits in the mirror. I realized this the other day when shooting my photo session for my new shirts. How do you not feel awkward staring at yourself in the mirror, trying to act nonchalant, knowing that what you are taking is about to be posted for the world to see? This girl has got it down, but me..not so much. Thanks husband for reminding me how awkward the photos did turn out.

7. Reading aloud to a group of people when you suddenly come across a word you don’t know how to pronounce. I use the quiet/mumble method, meaning you just mumble how you think it would be said and say it 10 decibels lower than every other word you are saying. Not obvious at all. Okay, joke. It might be obvious.

8. Talking to somebody and your bra suddenly comes unclasped. Knowing there is a 50/50 chance the person you are conversing with notices your bra is up to your neck can be a little uncomfortable.

9. The insanely fast way I eat my food. Shawn has taken a real interest in noticing this trait of mine recently. It is a good feeling when your husband is staring at you across the table, wide eyed, jaw dropped, in amazement realizing his wife shovels in food like a 800 pound pig. I have never felt more attractive. I can’t help it people, I like to eat. Get over it.

No, this is not me. But a pretty good replica. I like to think I look a little nicer than this when inhaling my food.
Awesome
1. The other evening I had to paint my nails for work, yellow none the less. I love yellow but not particularly on my nails. Regardless, I say to Shawn “Well, I have to go paint my nails now..” and he responds with “I should paint them for you”. (I think I might’ve just gotten in trouble for writing that. Oops.) So anyhow, that’s what happened. He painted them, I loved every minute of it, and they turned out pretty good. That kid has got some raw nail painting talent ;)
2. The Ellen show. Holy hysterical. Thank goodness for DVR-we get to watch her hour of hilariousness nightly. Walk into our house during this hour and you will see tears, hear knee slaps, and witness two people bent over from laughing so hard. Not kidding. If anybody else saw the “Woop Woop” segment this past week, please let me know and please tell me you laughed insanely hard.


3. Having a complete stranger say to me at the end of a phone call “You’re the best”. Glad to see you are a quick learner stranger J Ha, I kid, I kid.

4. My best friend sliding across a gymnasium floor (willingly, in a superman fashion none the less) with people everywhere, at a benefit function. This is the same best friend who gets embarrassed if I talk a little loud in public. I was beyond proud of her in this moment. 

5. Wearing my dance pants leggings this past Saturday night. A couple hours of dropping it low, cupid shuffling, grapevine, and spinning in circles made for one of the better evenings of my year. Highlight of the night? The DJ played Eric Church’s song “Smoke A Little Smoke”. I have dreamt about the day I would be able to dance in a public place to this song. Not joking around here, told you I have BIG dreams!

6. These pretty little eye shadows, compliments of Mary Kay. They will make you pretty, promise.
7. The power of a shower. I’m a poet and didn’t even know it. Ha, okay moving on.. Jumping in that enclosed space full of water and soap transforms me from Lazy Bones Jones to some productive superwoman in 12 minutes flat. I might’ve overestimated the whole productive superwoman thing, but you get the point.

8. Answered prayers. From finding my poor little lost cell phone in Sams to friends of ours receiving an adopted child they had been wanting for years this past week. They never get old and to me that is awesome my friends.

9. Belting out Lion King’s “I just can’t wait to be King” this morning. Stomping my feet and raising my hands when it comes to the part “Everywhere you look I’m..standing spotlight” is the perfect start to my day. It is so much cooler in my head than what it is for you folks reading about it though. I am on a huge stage with thousands of people watching. I’ll let you know when it becomes a reality.

Is it weird I picture myself this way?!

10. English & Southern accents. I continually tell myself I am going to go a whole day speaking in either, but then I ruin it when I start out by saying “Hello, I am from British.” I can’t ever remember it is Britain. Once I get it down maybe I will post a tutorial on how to speak like a Brit. Ooooh, I am excited.

   Have a beautiful day!

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4 comments:

  1. i have so totally gone through the size sticker ordeal.

    loved yours!!

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  2. aw, im so glad that i'm not the only one who has fallen victim to the facebook creeping!!
    and ellen is basically my hero (:

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  3. Love your blog Eric! Your mom told me both of her girls are blogging - she has raised great kids!

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  4. HAHAHA - Erin, I die laughing at your awkward/awesome moments. I just started reading your blog (recent posts) but today's brought me back to your first one and I'm starting from there. 1. ordering from the subway man was HILarious and 2. "ELLLLO, I'm from British" made me pee a little. Love love love.

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I read and appreciate every one of your comments. Thanks for stopping by my space and sharing a piece of yourself on this huge ole internet. I meant that in the least creepy way possible. I'm just good at making everything awkward. Anyhow, thank you for your comments. They make me smile :)